There are many times in life when we think our life is over. Then we realize it was a false alarm and things are not nearly as “extreme” as we make them out to be*. *Please note: there are some exceptions to this rule. You are all bright enough to know the exceptions I may be referring to.
From the ages of four through ten, anytime I found myself getting in trouble (which seemed to be a lot…hard to believe I know), I thought my life was over.
From the ages of eleven through sixteen, the thought of a boy finding out I liked him was enough to think my life was over.
Once I got my G1 & G2 (which refers to a graduated driver’s licence for those not in Canada), the thought of failing my G (the final test) would mean my life was over. What if I was never able to drive on the highway? What if I never got over my fear of merging on to the highway? What if I had to rely on others for a ride all the time? The reality is, I failed my G and my life continued. I took it again and I passed (THANK GOD!)
Into my University years, I found myself once again thinking that if certain situations happened, my life would be over. Example 1: not finding roommates to live with in 2nd year Example 2: when my parents decided they wanted to invest in a property rather than have me rent, which meant I needed my roommates at the time to put their trust in my folks. (Although awkward at the time, it ended up turning out great as we ended up with two fabulous mystery roommates!)
After University, the scenarios seemed more grown-up and made the ones prior to them seem small. Where would I live? Could I afford to move out on my own? What would happen if I couldn’t find a job? What happens if I lose my job? Will I ever find true love or will I be alone forever?
I recently read “Embracing Uncertainty” by Susan Jeffers and in one of the chapters, she describes what happens when we detach ourselves from expectations. She goes on to say that more often than not, it is our obsession with the outcome and our grand expectations that lead us to worry, get discouraged, and disappointed. As oppose to bringing us happiness, our focus on the outcome pull us away from the present and as such we find ourselves trapped in a never-ending game of “what next” vs. “what now.”
We are brilliant beings. We are creative, innovative, and have wild imaginations. We are also perfectly imperfect (atleast I am) and can let our grand expectations get the best of us. This is not to say that goals aren’t important-they are. What I invite you to consider is that the pathway to achieving our goals is filled with adventure and inspiration, moments of mayhem and moments of mastery, and some pretty darn amazing people and experiences. It is the “now” moments that matter. It is the realization that despite set-backs and disappointment, life is NOT over. Rather, we have the opportunity to be more alive than ever and come to an understanding that everything is just a part of our process in the evolution of our being.
As my good friend and author Jay Allen says, “Things don’t happen to us, they happen FOR us.”